Thursday, 2 December 2010

Back In Salem- The Journey So Far.

Art Brut are back in Salem recording our new album with Black Francis.

Actually we haven't started yet. I've just woken up on the first day refreshed and ready to go. It was a long journey to get here and I slept for most of it.

The five of us headed out on two separate airplanes. Mike and Fred went via San Fransico to Portland and Ian, Jasper and I got to Portland via New York on Delta. This isn't because we needed space from each other or anything, just because we are all flying back at different times.

It seems it was training day at Heathrow and we were the test subjects. I'm guessing we were the first people the security person we spoke too had ever had too clear. He had some questions I'd never heard before.

"Where did you pack your clothes?"


"How did you get to the airport?"

After he had gone to his supervisor to make sure we were ok to go, he came back over with a few more questions. The first was

"Do you ever make videos?"

Which I thought was a weird one, and made me slightly worried that he had seen THIS and wasn't going to let me fly. Then he asked

"Do you ever use professional actors?"

To which we lied and said yes (the real answer being no we cant afford them). Then it all became clear when he said.

"Because I'm only working here till I get back on my feet acting wise, I mean I've been in an episode of Spooks and in the backround of Torchwood and I even did an advert"

Then his final question.

"Can I send you a head shot?"

I gave him Jasper's email address.

Then we got on the plane and flew with Delta's really grumpy old lady cabin staff across the atlantic, trying to make them smile or at least be civil to us, with no success.

We had to change in New York and get on another plane to Portland. As I sat in my new seat a friendly American (you know the sort) asked me if I was allergic to cats. I thought it was a pretty unusual conversation starter but he had a cat with him under his seat. Apparently it costs nearly twice as much to fly a cat as it does to fly a person. I explained to him how cheap cats are to replace but apparently that was a bit cold of me. That didn't stop him talking so I suggested that next time he fly he shave the cat and dress it up as a baby as I think they travel free. Then to his relief the stewardess made me change seats.

I spent the entire flight asleep with my head sliding around on the seat listening to Bob Dylan and dreaming that I was rocking out. Which was embarrassing both in the real world as my head kept colliding into people and also in the dream world as I was actually listening to a lot of slow songs like Lenny Bruce and the people at the gig in the dream kept telling me stop dancing as I was ruining their experience. So I woke doubly embarrassed.

When we got off the plane, we immediately bumped into Mike and Fred who had arrived at exactly the same time. Although they looked a lot fresher than us.

We grabbed our stuff and our friend Jason picked us up to take us to our other friend Charles Normal's house where we are staying and is AMAZING. Then I slept some more, sadly I didn't return to the Bob Dylan concert to apologize for my behaviour.

We're just heading off to the studio now. See you later.


Shane Michael Cook said...

It's great to hear you are back in Salem! Have you seen the remodeled place? There is an container of peanuts in the cabinet above the refrigerator. Please don't eat these as they are mine and I look to get back to them early February.

Will Bragg said...

Speaking of babies & shaved cats, Charles & his wife are soon to welcome a new one in their home. Better enjoy the space and their brilliant hospitality!

AmyBlue said...

Talking like that about cats leaves you in danger of being on the recieving end of the nutters that took against Cat Bin Lady (tm), even so, bloody marvellous idea!