Monday, 7 March 2011

Postcards!


I like postcards for reasons I write about HERE.

I've been making one for every show I play for nearly a year now. This one is for the show we played in New York on friday.

The show was ace fun our first in ages. It went really well I had a great time. Im too tired to write about it now though.

This postcard is in acrylic across two canvases. On the canvas that is the back of the postcard I write about the show and then attach one of my own stamps to it before addressing it to you. This set costs £42 (including postage)

When I send it to you I put a real stamp on the envelope I send it in (mine unfortunately don't work in the real world, yet)

If you are interested email me at eddie.argos.resource@gmail.com

Unprofessional Wrestling.

There is a free new Art Brut song. It's called Unprofessional Wrestling. You can get it HERE

People have been emailing me asking about the lyrics. I thought I was enunciating perfectly well. Here they are though.

Unprofessional Wrestling

It started off as just kissing

Now it’s a lot of sweat and a mess of limbs

We didn’t wait for a bell to ring

We’re unprofessional wrestling

Watch out for stray mattress springs

That carpet burn its going to sting

I can wear a leotard if that’s your thing

We’re unprofessional wrestling

I don’t even try to stop

What looks like a figure four leg lock

I don’t really care who wins

We’re unprofessional wrestling

I don’t think

I know what to do

We’re both still

Learning how to do these move

I don’t think

you know what to do

We’re both still learning

how to do these moves

We didn’t remove, our rings so

Trousers rip and a bra strap pings

They’ll be grazing on my shins

We’re unprofessional wrestling

I don’t know if I can cope

With you jumping from the top rope

You’ve already pulled my hamstring

Unprofessional wrestling

I don’t want you to put anybody else in

A full suplex half nelson

123 I’ll let you pin me

123 I’ll let you pin me

123 I’ll let you pin me

123 I’ll let you pin me

123 I’ll let you pin me

123 I’ll let you pin me

123 I’ll let you pin me

I cant wait to see what you do

As your finishing move


My ears are still ringing from Unprofessional Wrestling.


We have a pledge page now too. It is HERE if you fancy a look.

An Open Letter To Axl Rose (originally written for Artrocker Magazine)

Dear Axl Rose.

Let me start off by saying I am a fan of your work. You have many fine songs. I also like the fact that you tell everybody to fuck off all the time. My younger brother found this inspiring growing up - it helped him find his voice in the world.

Unfortunately, I'm writing to you with regard to your recent appearance at the Reading Festival. I was in attendance with my brother and his best friend Tom. It was the first time either of them had seen you play. Although they enjoyed it (they were perhaps the only two people singing along to songs from Chinese Democracy), I felt the performance a little lacking. Don’t get me wrong, I still think you rocked the fuck out, but you have some of the world’s greatest songs in your arsenal and you left them unused or played them in a state of disrepair.

Do you know the other bands that were playing at this festival? Weezer, The Libertines, The Arcade Fire. These bands are a fucking joke compared to you. They all dream of having a song as good as November Rain, You Could Be Mine, Welcome To The Jungle, Estranged, Night Train, or Paradise City – songs which you just threw away with stadium rock posturing.

So Axl, let me tell you what you need to do. Put your house in order. You don't need that many guitarists. Pick a couple of your favourites and size down a bit. Once you have a more manageable-sized band (make sure to keep Tommy Stinson, as he was in The Replacements), start playing small secret shows and learn to enjoy yourself again. You will soon realise that you don’t need big gongs, fireworks or bizarre covers of Pink Floyd’s The Wall to have a good show. Take it from me, your songs stand up on their own.

Basically Axl, what I'm saying is that you used to be in the best rock and roll band in the world, and you still can be. You just need to remember where you came from. Once you've got yourself in order you can start telling everybody to fuck off again and I will have your back.

Oh and one other piece of advice, one that my brother was shouting at you at the festival: When you use a megaphone you have to hold the button down to make yourself heard.

Wednesday, 2 March 2011

POSTCARDS!


I love postcards I explain why HERE.

I've been making them for every show I've played for quite sometime now. I like the thought of something unique and personal being available from each of our shows.

Last night Art Brut played at Jericho in Oxford you can see the postcard in my previous post and then the back of it after the show HERE. I've smudged John's address out with iPhoto so you dont all send him letters.

Tonight a band that sounds a bit like Art Brut (but definitely isn't us) called We Formed A Band is playing at the Enterprise in Camden. So I've made a post card for them.

It is in acrylic paint on two pieces of canvas. Once it is bought I attach one of my stamps and write about the show on the canvas that is the back of the postcard. This postcard cost £40.

I can be contacted at eddie.argos.resource@gmail.com

Hopefully see you later. I will be down the front.

Monday, 28 February 2011

POSTCARDS!


I really like postcards. I explain why HERE.

For EWITFR...N! I made a postcard for every show. I intend to do the same for Art Brut this year.

This postcard is for the Oxford Jericho which we're playing at tomorrow. I've never been there before but from my internet research. I see they have a green sofa on the stage and Cuban flags hanging over the speakers.

I hope the green sofa is still on stage when we play. Its been a while and I might get a bit tired halfway though the set.

This postcard cost £40 for that you get both the canvasses. On the piece of canvas which is the back of the Postcard I write in what happened the day of the gig personally addressed to you. I then add one of my own stamps.


I'll have it with me tomorrow. If you are interested email eddie.argos.resource@gmail.com

Thanks.

Sunday, 27 February 2011

Eating In The Dark

Hello. My posts from the studio just before christmas ended rather abruptly sorry about that. I was learning to sing. The album is finished and should be out sometime in May.

Since recording the album I've moved to Berlin with my girlfriend. It is ace. My brother and his girlfriend came to visit last week so we got to do all the things tourists do. My favourite thing we did was to visit a restaurant called Nocti Vagus, a restaurant where you eat in the pitch black.

The first thing you do at Nocti Vagus is chose from one of four set menus. You do this upstairs where the lights are on so you can see. Three of us chose the meat menu and Hannah my brothers girlfriend chose the suprise menu. After you've chosen your meal you get taken downstairs to the dark room where you eat.

To ensure the dark room stays completely pitch black there is a holding room that you stand in before you enter. They turn off the lights in the holding room, open the door to the dark restaurant and then with your hand on the shoulder of the person in front of you you walk in to complete and utter darkness.

It was really scary at first. Your eyes are still trying to see things so you end up seeing lots of strange shapes. I don't trust my own mind whatsoever and was worried that it might suddenly decide to show me The Dungeon Master from the cartoon Dungeons and Dragons. I've been scared of that little fella for as long as I can remeber and because of that I forced my eyes shut for the first ten minutes. Whilst I was sat terrified with my eyes shut everybody else familiarized themselves with where the table was and where they were sat. I wish I had done this as when my first course arrived I realised I was sat about 2ft away from the table.

Once I found the table and then my soup and then my spoon and eventually my mouth I started to eat. The food really was delicious and my memory is so bad that it was like I had the suprise menu too. Once I started eating I began to relax a bit as the meal became more of a game, the trying not to get food all over myself game, I wasn't very good at it.

By the time I got to the second course I was completely relaxed. I was loving it. I was getting quite bold though. To see if I'd finished my plate of mash potato and lamb chops I put my hand flat on to my plate. I hadn't finished and my hand got covered in food. It was dark though so nobody could see me mucking about and licking lamb chops off my hand. This is brilliant I thought no etiquette. I was brought down to earth with a bump though when the waiter came back to the table and asked which one of us had used his dessert spoon to eat his soup, it was me. Even in the dark you cant escape cutlery based fascism. That is my only complaint of the meal though. I had a brilliant night. By the time it came to ordering our coffee I wanted to go round again and order another three courses.

Actually I had one other disappointment with the meal. It was with the suprise menu. I had been hoping through out the meal that it would turn out Hannah hadn't been eating anything at all. That her entire meal would just have been the power of suggestion.

To be honest though as we walked out into the light it turned out none of us had any food on us, not even me. So perhaps we had imagined all our food. If that is the case I should start trusting my mind more as my food was brilliant.

Tuesday, 15 February 2011

Biff! Bang! Downloadable comics!


I wrote a new Pow! To The People supposedly about downloading comics. It was more a thinly veiled begging letter for comics though. You can read it HERE